So we’re a day late, and a dollar short. But in our hearts, every day is President’s Day. God bless America and God bless the late President Franklin Pierce’s foine ass.
- “I’m bout to make it rain some pay-paz’s up in herrr!” – Martin Van Buren
- “Poppin collars and bangin’ models. That’s how I do, son.” – James Buchanan
- “I dare you not to look at my crotch. I dare you…” – Grover Cleveland
- “I smell a poot. A Taco Bell poot indeed.” – Calvin Coolidge
- “Why yes, I will have another flirtini.” – Thomas Jefferson
- “Damn girl I wanna chop down yo’ cherry tree.” – George Washington
- “Bitch Please.” – James Monroe
- “I vant to suck your bloooood! Muahahahahaha!” – Andrew Jackson
- (singing) “Hungry eyes…one look at you and I can’t disguise I’ve got…hungry eyes.” – James Madison
- “How YOU Doin’?” – Franklin Pierce
- “You know what’s awesome? My mutton chops. You know what’s more awesome? My titty chair.” – John Quincy Adams
- “Hello Clarisse.” – James K. Polk
- “I wonder if Kim will get back with Reggie? I wonder….” – Abraham Lincoln
- “They took my rings. They took my Rolex. I looked at the brother said damn what’s next.” – Warren G. Harding














OMG!!! I actually snort laughed at this. I then tried to play cool and pretend I was coughing or choking in my office. I don’t think my coworkers are buying it…. but this was funny as hell!!!